Life really isn’t about what we have – it’s about what we choose.

We don’t always think of it that way. It’s easy to believe that life just happens to us, that circumstances dictate what’s possible. But over time, I’ve learned that a full, joyful life is almost always the result of intentional choices – often small ones, made repeatedly, and sometimes quietly, without much fanfare.

For my husband and me, one of the clearest examples of this is how we’ve chosen to live modestly so that we can travel.

Early in our relationship, the plan was simple and logical. We each owned our own home – 12 houses apart. At the time, he had already completely renovated his house and the market was hot. It made sense to sell one or both or our times for our longer term plan of getting married and living happily ever after together. So we decided to sell his house and he would move into mine; we would fix it up and sell it too, and then buy a home together – something bigger, something newer, maybe with a pool, something that felt like the next step.

So we tried. Twice.

We put two outrageous offers on already overpriced houses and were outbid both times. And after the second one, we stopped. Not out of frustration, but out of clarity. We asked ourselves a question that changed everything: Is that what we really want?

At first it felt like we were being denied something we thought we were supposed to want. But what we realized – slowly and gratefully – was that maybe we were being saved from a choice that didn’t align with the life we truly wanted to live.

So we stayed.

Staying meant choosing our little neighborhood – its history, our neighbors, the sense of community we’d built over time. It meant not buying the bigger house, not taking on a larger mortgage, higher property taxes, or bigger utility bills. It means continuing to live modestly, not out of necessity, but out of strategy.

That choice created a margin. Financial margin. Emotional margin. Freedom.

By staying in our modest home and driving our cars for as long as they’ll last, we’ve been able to say yes to experiences instead of things. We didn’t accidentally become people who travel often – we choose it.

We see travel as so much more than a luxury. For us, it’s education. It’s perspective. It’s fun. My husband loves history, so many of our trips are shaped around that – walking ancient streets, standing where history happened, seeing places we once only read about.

Some of our trips have been more luxurious, especially those taken with friends. Those trips deepened friendships and, in some cases, created entirely new ones. There’s something about shared experiences – meals, laughter, missed trains, long walks – that forges bonds quickly and meaningfully.

And those friendships matter. I’ve learned that different friends serve different purposes. There are inner-circle friends, neighborhood friends, activity friends, seasonal friends, and family friends. Each group adds richness in its own way, without needing to be everything.

Not all travel has to be grand or far away. Some of our most meaningful trips have been smaller ones – family trips, quick getaways, local adventures. Day trips to wineries. Weekends spent exploring nearby towns. Intentional time together, creating warmth, memories, and connection.

Those moments count. They add up. They are the foundation of a life well lived.

One of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that priorities change with seasons of life. What mattered deeply 10 years ago may look different today, and what we value now may evolve again in the future. Staying put, choosing community, and living modestly works for us in this season – and we’re grateful for that.

The truth is, we all have the same 24 hours in a day. What makes our lives look so different is how we choose to spend them.

So I ask you this: What is most important to you? What do you want to prioritize? Life is about choices. And the beautiful thing is – you get to keep choosing. 

What will you choose next?